I Think I'm Growing Up!!

Before I had children, I was so smart and I knew everything. I was so grown up!! Parenting shmarenting. I read all the latest parenting books while I was pregnant with Mark. I thought to myself, "This isn't so hard, I know exactly what I'll do!" But then Mark was born and I had a brain hemorrhage of knowledge. I became pretty stupid, let's just be honest. I had no idea what I was doing! I panicked everytime he cried and swore I was done having children.

I was a hyperactive mother. Everything had to be just so. Mark wore perfectly matched clothes, with his hair combed to exactness. I followed a perfectly devised schedule each day. All meal times and nap times and bedtimes were scheduled. I followed the experts advice and put Mark in time-out for the exact minutes equal to his age. NO spanking...heaven forbid.

Back then, my home was pretty clean, too. "A place for everything and everything in it's place", as the saying goes. Toys consisted of one little basketful. Laundry consisted of 3 or 4 loads per week. I finally got into the swing of things...I was feeling pretty smart again. And then I had Savannah.

Then Wynter, then Hunter, then Micah and then Lincoln. I've just kept getting more and more stupid with each child. They are each so very different! And, needless to say, things around here have changed a bit, too.

Perfectly matched clothes? HA HA!! I'm just glad they get dressed! My kids dress themselves and who knows what outfits they will come up with! And hair combed to exactness? Whatever. And a schedule? I try to have consistency, but the only thing that is consistent is that nothing is ever consistent! Dinner is at the same time each night, but as for the other meals, it's survival of the fittest. If you can't make a sandwich by yourself, you better learn how and learn fast. (I do feed the baby, he's pretty helpless that way.) And spanking? I admit, I have/do...but rarely and when it is VERY necessary.

Toys consist of a closet full. Laundry is 14 loads per week. I can't find things a lot of the times, so although I do have a place for everything...nothing ever gets put back!! So, if you're into cleanliness, please call and give me 24 hours notice so that I can have things ready for your visit.

But, here's where the grown-up part comes in...It doesn't matter. The "perfectness" doesn't matter. The more children I've had, the dumber I've gotten in some ways, but the more grown-up I've become in other ways. For example, the other day we went to the park as a family. It had rained that day and there was a HUGE puddle just begging to be splashed in. And Micah did just that! And I didn't care. And, today, we were outside working on the yard and the sprinkler was on. It created a puddle in the sidewalk...a nice muddy puddle that Lincoln plopped his little self in. And I didn't care. He was having fun. You may be wondering if I just didn't care because I'm too darn tired. Nope. And while I'm on a roll here, I will just say that, yes, Lincoln has eaten a bug or two, and yes, my kids eat in front of the tv, and yes, I have taken Micah to the store in the summer while he's wearing shorts and snowboots, and yes, I will neglect the laundry from time to time until it is so tall the kids can pretend it's Mt. Everest. But, really, who cares?? I think that over the past 16 years of parenting, I'm finally realizing what is important.

I realize that one day I will miss this. I will miss the wet shoes and the wet muddy little body. I will miss the noise and the chaos that always seems to occur while I'm making dinner or I'm on the phone. I will miss the messes. I will miss the "why" questions from my curious 7 year old and the "what if" questions from my 16year old. I will miss all the little things that make up my life. This is it. Life IS in the details. I've learned to relax ALOT over the years and enjoy it all more.

And I've also learned in Whom I can trust. My loving Heavenly Father. He is always there. I can rely on Him to get me through the tough spots. I can rely on Him to help me through the day when I didn't get much sleep the night before. I can rely on Him to guide me to the answers when I have questions. Through Him and through my Savior, all things are possible and manageable. I can do all things with His help. And yes, I truly believe that "...Men/women are that they might have joy." (Nephi 2:25)

So, look at me, I'm growing up...and it's pretty nice.